Tuesday, July 26, 2016

Dear Diary

Dear Diary

Well, this week started out rather sketchy.  I woke up late yesterday having slept past my alarm. I had a skype call with my pal Emma and she woke me up and saw what I truly look like first thing in the morning.  She didn't know it but I had to pee soooo bad the whole time I talked to her but I held on! LOL!

I had such a busy day on Monday and Emma and I had set up such a good plan for me to get my routines in order.  I know that this is a good idea and it will help me in the long run even though I fight her on it all the time.  I am just so busy!  She doesn't understand it, she can't possibly know how busy I really am!  After I ended my call with her, I was supposed start my "healthy eating" yesterday, but because I didn't have anything planned and I had overslept that went right out the window.  So it was the take away for me all day.  I scrambled around and realized I had NO CLEAN CLOTHES for me or my granddaughter, luckily I had just purchased new underclothes over the weekend and we wore "reasonably clean" clothes for the day.  I gathered my stuff up and headed out to get my expired drivers license renewed.  I did make sure I had my birth certificate and ss card with me.

I get to the dmv and there is no parking it is sooo full!  I go online and check in and the wait is 2 hrs long.  So, I head over to my first stop for work to try to get something productive done for work, not only do I not have all the paperwork and reports done to finish the task we need, neither does my SHE boss!  We are a mess together!!  We spend 3 hours looking for missing files and never find them and then try to recreate what we are missing and then coming up with a new organization plan for next year!  I have missed my appointment at the dmv!  I figured I would just get it on my way back to town since it is open until 6:30 pm.  

I finally get out to my job at 2:00 pm.  I grabbed some more fast food on the way there and eat on the go.  Poor little granddaughter is just being dragged along with me on my hot mess of a day.  I'm at the office for about 3 hours before I have to leave to meet someone.  During that time, granddaughter is out in the daycare playing and has a melt down because one of the kids isn't playing fair.  She throws a temper tantrum and gets in big trouble and ends up in her room all night for being disrespectful, however, in this process I lose my temper (I know we both have this problem because the day has just been so bad).  We both calm down and leave the office and go to next phase of meeting someone for purchase, getting gas because car is on EMPTY.  

Finally after that go back to DMV and get checked back in and expedited to front of line.  I need proof of residence, like a utility bill.  HOWEVER! I actually cleaned out my purse the other day looking for a BENEDRYL because I was out (YES COMPLETELY OUT) and I was hoping to find just one on the bottom of my bag.  So, not utility bill in my purse.  So, no drivers license renewed yesterday! However, I did find out I have 184 day to renew and I am just 3 weeks past.  I will be doing it this week though!

I then left there and delivered items to both my daughter at their places so they did not need to visit mine and I finally made it home at 6:30 pm, the prescribed time to start my brand new routines!  I however did not do a single routine!  I did not cook dinner!  I did not do dishes!  I did not make lunch!  I sat my booties in that chair and nearly cried at the day I had!

I spent about 15 minutes feeling pathetic, then I got up, gathered all of the kiddos laundry and washed it all!  I even through in enough of mine that I don't smell funny today!  I still didn't do my routines, I just relaxed and watched a movie and crocheted a little.

Then this morning was a new day!  I woke up and I made a wonderful healthy breakfast!  I packed a delicious healthy lunch and I loaded the dishwasher and started it before I left for work.  Granddaughter and I both are wearing clean clothes and things are going much smoother and today has a plan! I like plans and I like positive outlooks and I like when it feels good and feels right!  I'll work on the routine thing, I'm sure they're not as stupid as they sound and they might actually be good for something.  UGH!  I just am going to hate listening to Emma gloat about this!

Thursday, January 8, 2015

Job Interviewing....Again!

Well, I never thought at my age I would be out looking for a job again, but I'm doing it.  I'm on the hunt for a job again!  I had my first interview today. It either went really really well with a few bad parts.   Or it was terrible with a few shining moments.  The only really great thing I can say is that I made it thru the entire thing without using any curse words and I didn't call him dude!  I'd say it's a win!


Wednesday, January 1, 2014

I don't do "resolutions"

I used to make resolutions every year and every year I would just let myself down by letting those resolutions go by the wayside.  So I don't do resolutions anymore.  I try to look at the new year as a new beginning.  I think of the things that I have been wanting/needing to work on and I give myself this chance to start fresh and not feel guilty that I haven't started or done it yet.  I try to pace myself on what I start on because I don't want to change everything all at once and I don't want to get myself overwhelmed.

This last month of 2013 has been challenging for me in many ways.  Financially it has been almost devastating, but I have hope that 2014 will be better.  I have sought help for our financial issues and I hope to learn how to manage our finances myself this year.  Medically December was very difficult also.  I have been fighting an addiction to over the counter nasal decongestant spray.  Now this may not sound serious, but it really has been difficult.  I discovered around Thanksgiving that I was addicted (I didn't think it was a problem) and I had been for several months.  It was causing nose bleeds and when I didn't use it I would get even more congested then I have ever been in my life.  I would lose my sense of smell and taste for days and I could not sleep without the nasal spray.  I started to dilute the nasal spray with saline and wean myself off of it and I decided I was not going into the new year with this issue, so now I have not used it in 4 days and I'm doing better but I still want to use it everyday.  I was also contacted by my doctor a few weeks ago and he told me that I have type 2 diabetes. That is certainly throwing a monkey wrench into my pecan pie plans for Christmas.  My marriage is going great, but my husband was gone for most of December and was home for 3 days over Christmas and then left again.  He won't be home until sometime in February, which means he will miss our wedding anniversary on January 13th.  But I am still hopeful that 2014 will be a much better year for our family!

The one new thing I would like to try for me this year is Yoga!  I am going to start with 3 times a week and try to go for balance and focus and peace this year.  I think if I can bring a bit of that into my world, things will be better!

Tuesday, September 3, 2013

Looking for my track!

As I said yesterday, my train was totally derailed last week.  This week I may not be immediately back on track, but I am searching for the tracks!

I decided to start on the 31 Beginner BabySteps from the Flylady website.  I started last night and I figure if I document it here I may have a better shot of following through because I will be able to look at my progress and see when I derail again and maybe I will be able to get back on track a bit quicker if that should happen.

So last night I started babystep 1 which is shine your sink.  The idea is to start on day 1 and then keep adding something new each day until you have completed the 31 days.  So by the end of 31 days I have done day 1 31 times and it should be a habit by then.  It is retraining your brain to do the things that you should be doing everyday to keep your home in functioning order and to keep the chaos away. 

Day 1 - Shine your sink

I did this last night before I went to bed.  Now you may not think it is a big deal, but usually I don't have the sink empty, it is full of dishes that need to be washed and smelly sponges and dirty dishcloths and I don't even want to tell you some of the other things I have found in there.  So this is kinda a big deal for me!

Day 2 - Get dressed to the shoes + Day 1

I don't have a picture of me dressed to the shoes, but I did it and I even did hair and a little make up today which I never do!  First thing when I walked into work one of the teachers noticed and said I looked pretty today!  I was in a good mood all day.  I came home and relaxed for a while and then I got up and finished putting up the counter in my dye lab like I have been meaning to, then I washed a sink full of dishes and shined my sink again!

(see the clean dishes in the drainer?)  I also washed and dried a load of laundry and threw out some crap that was just laying about.  I am feeling quite proud of myself actually!  I will keep working and I will try to post daily!



Monday, September 2, 2013


Well, this week has been a train wreck (pun intended)!  I had so many great plans!  I even took pictures of the before mess of my dye lab like I said I would...it is still in the before mode :-(

I worked a ton this last week and it was such a stressful week that I broke out on my forehead with 3 pimples!!!  I know, big deal right?  Well I NEVER get pimples on my forehead!  I may get one or two on my chin or next to my nose, but never on my forehead!  I mean really?  I'm 43 years old, I am not a teenager!  Oh well, at least they are starting to clear up!

I would love to tell you all the gory details of my week but for confidentiality purposes at my job I can't.  Lets just say it involves an out of control student, a selfish parent, the police and a great deal of alcohol!  I do not want to repeat this week!

On to this long holiday weekend!  I had great plans!  I should never make plans, they never happen!  I woke up Saturday at 4am and couldn't get back to sleep, I went yard sale-ing with my mom and my daughter, then I came home and fell asleep at 2pm and stayed in bed for about 18 hours.  I got some awesome stuff at the yard sales, I got a Cricut Electronic Cutter for just $30!!!  I am going to use it to make these awesome journals for my craft show coming up in November! 

 Sunday I ended up just laying around all day and reading, I have read 3 books this weekend because I am easily distracted!  I did go to my mom's on Sunday for dinner and to visit with my grandma, we had a good time, I was home by 6pm.  Today was going to be my productive day!  Derailed!  I woke up with a killer headache and it has been so bad all day that I have been nauseous and sick all day!  Finally, at 8pm, the headache is gone but my stomach is still a wreck and I am wrung out!  So today...not so productive!  I did wash a sink full of dishes, but I still have a ton left to do.  I feel like I haven't cleaned house in a month!  Of course, cleaning isn't my strong suit, so I probably haven't! 

Tomorrow is a new day, so I think I'm going to try a new start and start the Flylady plan!  I have done it before and it has helped, I do have commitment issues though.  I get distracted easily and have always lost my way.  I am really going to try to stick with it this time.  I know it will help me and make my life so much easier.  Maybe I will start tonight since the first step is to shine your sink and I have been working on my dishes a little today.  I can do this!



Friday, August 23, 2013

Finally Friday!!!

Yay!!!  I am so excited that it's FRIDAY!!!

I have the grandbabies this evening, and I have been super busy at work today and I really want to go to the movies tonight to see the new Mortal Instruments movie...but I'm not going.  I could go see it at the 11pm showing, buuuuutttt...today I finally committed and bought cabinets and a countertop and chair for my dye lab.  I pick it up in the morning so tonight after the girls leave I have to get in there and clean out all the boxes stacked in the dye lab so I can set up the counter tomorrow and start working again.

I had found some counters a few weeks ago at RESTORE the Habitat for Humanity store here in town but Hubby said no because the dye lab was still full of boxes and we had no place to put them.  I tried to tell him that having the counters would motivate me to get it done, but he still said no.  So today I went back and found some different counters and I bought them and I only spent $53.50 on two cabinets, an old door for the countertop and a chair!  I go pick it up in the morning.  So, tonight I have no choice, I have to get the dye lab ready for my new stuff!  I'm so excited!  I will take before and after pictures and post them tomorrow!


Thursday, August 22, 2013

If you start the day with a dose of crazy...

So, I went to work in my pajamas today.  I know, I know, who wouldn't love that?  But, what actually happened is my best friend/boss called me this morning at 8am (I'm usually off on Thursdays) and said the health department called and gave 30 minutes notice that they were inspecting one of the centers.  She needed to be there for that.  We both live 30 minutes a way from the center and she needed to get her son to school at 9am.  So, she asked me to meet her at the center and pick up her son and take him to school (also 30 minutes away from the center) because she didn't have time to drive my direction to drop off her son with me. So, I jump out of bed and rush to the center to help her out because I love her and she is my best friend.  I get to the center and she is the with the inspector and just finishing up, she says "oh, I can take him, we're done here, but you can see what our numbers are and stay here and work" UGH!  REALLY??  I'M IN MY PAJAMAS!!! I mean, yes, they are cute and I totally pull them off, but I didn't even bring my work with me, I left it at home in my office there!!! 

Luckily our numbers were low enough that they didn't need me to stay and help out.  We were fully staffed and bosslady was coming back later this morning to give the teachers their breaks and stuff so we were okay.  But talk about a crazy morning!!!  Sometimes it is really difficult to not have a regular office job!